KELLY BUNDY HAS CANCER

Christina Applegate has been diagnosed with breast cancer and is presently undergoing treatment.

Applegate's doctors were able to catch the disease early, so it is not life threatening.

Great to hear, considering Christina has cashed in big from her "Married With Children" days when she played the ditzy floozed out teenage bombshell Kelly Bundy. Now Applegate is an Emmy Award-winning actress with her own show.

What ever happened to Bud Bundy?

YUNG BERG BEEF CONTINUES

Yung Berg's concert attendance has dwindled since he dogged dark skinned women on a recent live radio broadcast.

Wow. Surprised people actually paid to see this guy. If you go to any local gay club in Chicago, you're bound to run in to him....free of charge.

NO ONE LOVES NEW YORK

So Tailor Made finally unloaded New York, now adding him to the long list of men who'd rather bathe in motor oil before dating this chick.

I mean come on, if you can't pull Flavor Flav, you're cooch-cooch has officially hit its expiration date. Her fifteen minutes of fame should be up right about.....

SHE'S NOT DEAD YET?

Liz Taylor was admitted to a Los Angeles hospital for a temporary precautionary visit.

A number of health issues have dogged Taylor through the years, including congestive heart failure in 2004 that, compounded with spinal fractures and the effects of scoliosis, left her nearly bedridden.

Okay, let me get this straight. Anna Nicole, dead. Rick James, dead. Heath Ledger, dead. Liz Taylor has consumed more drugs than Wu Tang Clan and this bitch still has ticks left? I'm baffled.

TEAIRRA MARI MAKES A COMEBACK

Teairra Mari is making a comeback. Okay, while we give you readers a minute to work up the energy to give a damn, news is that Teairra is now signed to Interscope Records.

Mari was previously signed to Roc-A-Fella records and was then dropped...right before her high school graduation.

I guess it's true what they say....for some people, your high school years are as good as it's gonna get.

BRITISH MUSIC HEADS SAY "NAH, I'M GOOD" TO JAY Z

Jay Z is not the cup of tea in Britain. Fans have objected Jay Z being the headliner of this year's Glastonbury Music Festival, a traditionally rock and roll event.

Even Trip-Hop artist Tricky (Yes, Lynn’s music partner and boyfriend on the TV show “Girlfriends”) has chimed in.

In an interview on Friday with the U.K.’s National Post, he said “I can understand in some ways, because an American artist headlining Glastonbury is probably a bit weird for people. And the fact that it’s an urban artist - and he’s not actually that good."

Wow. Sounds like haters to me. Fuck Tricky. He's just mad because Girlfriends could go into syndication for a trillion fa-fillion years and he will never see the money Jigga presently has. Keep it pushing Jigga and stack ya bread.